intro to my life

this will be all about my life and how i started out as a webmistress. i will also dive deep into my personal life and how i got to where i am now.

~chapter 1~

i was born in the late 90s, grew up in an era before capitalism really took a shit. a time where all of our food was rainbow, our shows were made by drug addicts, and our electronics were see-through and seemingly high tech for the times. i grew up with a computer, i've been attached at the hip to one ever since i was 2. i started exploring different online games, chatrooms, and trivia. in the early 2000s, the web was the place to be. so many different people online just trying to figure it all out. just the thought of having a device that can communicate so rapidly across the nations was such an evolutionary win. now 20 some-odd years later, i find myself reminiscing upon the early internet times. this is mostly why i created this website.

i first started out with graphic design and coding during the early myspace days. when i was like 10, i made myself a "sitemodel" that went by the name hyper chipmunk. after this point, i came up with my own myspace resource site in middle school. my first site was called fantabulous layouts, i used photofiltre to create my graphics. it was a lot of fun back then, so many people flocked to myspace for creative freedom and there were loads of creators at that time. there was never a dull moment on the early days of the internet. one of my final resource sites i created was elixirr.net and that was a blast. i really learned alot leading up to the creation of this website, including doing graphic design/layout design for "cults" on a website called vampirefreaks.com. this is a link to one of my old deviantart accounts that i would upload my graphics to. i loved making custom icons and banners for people on there, i miss vampirefreaks dearly. now it is just a store full of gothic clothing, no longer the social hotspot it used to be. i made some of my best friends on that site. sometimes i wish i could go back in time.

so that pretty much sums up the beginning of my graphic design adventure. i wanted to be and act like an adult at a very young age. i didn't realize the value of childhood until i have sprung into adulthood. it is quite sad, but i did have a fun time when i was a kid. i used to go on imvu, second life, zwinky, etc. i also loved playing dressup games and making dollz as well. i really loved to experience life through a screen, with a different persona entirely. i was so easily able to mask my age and identity. i feel like it's harder to do that now. i used to go on yahoo answers and diligently answer peoples' questions when i was 8-10 years old. the internet certainly accelerated my growth and development, but it also created some trauma as well. censorship was hardly a thing when i first started surfing the web, so i saw lots of things i probably shouldn't have seen at the time. my parents didn't know the dangers of the internet, because it was all new to them as well. it was an interesting time. i grew addicted to the computer as soon as i learned how to read and type. it is filled with so many wonders and joys that cannot compare to any real life experiences. it is its own reality.

~chapter 2~

to be written soon

shenanigans

this page will be daily shenanigans

8/15/2015: it has been quite the chaotic week at my work. i work retail and it has been ultra busy with back to school shopping. i can hardly see straight rn cuz im sooo tired so i will prolly come back and rant some more later after a good snooze...almost 20 hours later, but still in the same day...i'm back. i have fallen down quite the rabbit hole. i have had my personality be described as being very "down the rabbit hole." i am used to existing in a very chaotic space and have a very anxious day to day life. it is exhausting. i am slowly trying to unravel the trauma and the thick black smog that exists inside of my head. it is difficult to see past all of the darkness, but i am peeling back the painful layers one by one. i had a little shopping spree for myself, so that was fun. i have to go to bed soon cuz i gotta work tomorrow. i will probably update the site again on sunday.

8/10/2025: im surprised that i have been keeping up with this so often. it is not usual for me to be this chatty. today i have just been watching a bunch of ghost adventures lol i have just been kinda dissociating as per usual. i did, however, take a bath today so thats a win for self care. i feel like doing my nails but it seems like a lot of work to clean them up and paint them. i will consider it on my next day off. i have been trying to save my money as much as i can, but i have been growing more tempted to buy an osrs membership again. im gonna wait till my bills are paid for the month and reconsider. f2p is fun and all, but there is sooo much more to do in members worlds. it it fantastic what you can achieve and accomplish with a membership. i have had my runescape account since 2005, making my account 20 years old. most of my childhood i spent long nights grinding out those quests and fighting hill giants. a few months ago i decided to get a membership and it was life changing, i loved all of the different things you could do across the entire map. i especially loved farming. it got to a point where i would have to grind for 12 hours a day to try to afford a bond in game, but it ended up becoming tedious and unenjoyable. i think if i work it into my monthly budget, it would have worth. just having access to all of the skills and map is worth it. im combat level 75 and have been grinding to base 60 for the past couple months. it has been such a fun time, i love the game. i have been considering creating a shrine for it :3 i also have been looking for emojis to use in my journal, im emoji obsessed hehehe. other than that, i really don't have much in motion right now. i think i have everything sorted out on my computer, i just need to make sure it all gets loaded onto the server! im getting ready for bed now :3

8/8/2025: i have been off work the past two days and it has been really nice to sit back and relax. i was able to sort thru some more of the pixels i have saved to this computer. you see, i started out this website on my laptop, but now i have transitioned over to a desktop. i have most of the files transferred over from it, but i still haven't gotten them up on the site yet. its alright tho, im just gonna take my time and make sure i put lots of love into creating each individual page. i love to customize things, customization is one of my favorite parts of any game. i love to make things look pretty and aesthetic, and i think im doing an alright job so far with this site. i was thinking about creating a halloween layout potentially...i think that could be fun. i cant believe halloween is already just around the corner. time flies by.

8/6/2025: i am really quite excited to be updating my website now. i used to fall down the rabbit hole of playing games for hours on end(not a bad thing btw) but it was just getting to be the same thing everyday. being able to code at my leisure everyday and enjoy the process has been really nice. i found a new resource website called foollovers and it is filled with many amazing things!! my whole website is gonna get an upgrade soon, i think i might change the main layout. im not sure what im going to do yet though! i have been updating this website around once a week. i just recently made a mock myspace page and an alien shrine. my next projects include finishing up the pixel home and adding more links to the main page. i also have to finish pixel pets and dump all my random pixels as well. it has been such a joy to get back into the swing of things, though. i look forward to editing this site.